The Library of Spanking Fiction: Wellred Weekly


Wellred Weekly
Volume 1, Number 1 : November 1, 2011
 
Articles
Items of interest regarding all things spanking

Getting Your Vanilla Partner to Whack Your Butt
by Eileena Cross


The question, 'Can I get my Vanilla partner to whack my butt?' is similar in essence to the age old question that has troubled parents for decades: 'Can I get my children to eat their Brussels sprouts?' The answer of course being, 'YES!' so long as you provide sufficient rewards for their efforts! However, getting your kids to actually enjoy those dreaded Brussels sprouts is a different matter entirely...

So, I hear you ask, 'How CAN I get my Vanilla partner to actually spank me... if he doesn't enjoy it?'

First of all I would like to address the issue of 'how' by citing some examples from personal experience. However before I do, I need to fill in some background details of my own Spanko epiphany. Having been married for approximately fifteen years, things in the bedroom department were starting to... shall I say dwindle and get rather boring! Even thinking of England had lost it's excitement! Taking the advice of a trusted friend, I decided to Google 'how to spice up your love life'. Amidst the many helpful suggestions there was one fantasy idea that really struck a chord... the spanked schoolgirl role-play for some reason totally excited me. In fact any idea which enabled me to be on the receiving end of a good spanking excited me! I had no idea why, but I knew from that instant that it was definitely something I wanted to try. The difficulty now was, how could I casually mention this to my Vanilla husband without feeling awkward or scaring the bejeebers out of him...?

After much thought I decided it would be preferable to NOT mention it at all, and that it would prove far less embarrassing for me if I resorted to sending subtle hints. Surely my red blooded male would respond to suggestive body language by giving my generous target a good slap?... Right?...

First of all I tried casually bending over several times, making sure I was within arms reach of my husband and giving my backside the occasional wiggle to direct his attention to the zone. This had little effect as Mr Vanilla barely noticed my actions and after a while he sarcastically remarked, "Wouldn't it be faster to use the vacuum? You'll be there all day picking up all that lint by hand!"

Okay, that attempt failed dismally! I obviously needed to up the ante. Figuring that a glimpse of butt cheek was sure to inspire Mr Vanilla to give my ass a good slap, I decided to wear my shortest black floaty skirt combined with a pair of white Brazilian high-cut lace panties for maximum contrast. I felt a surge of apprehension and excitement, believing that this approach was sure to gain the desired response. Once again I bent down pretending to remove fluff from the carpet. At first Mr Vanilla didn't comment, but presumably his frustration was building. This was illustrated eventually by his grumbled outburst, "Isn't that skirt a bit short for housework?" Okay, so that attempt went down like a lead balloon!

Feeling thoroughly disheartened I planned my last ditch effort. Maybe, the sight of a bare bending bubble-butt would inspire him to give it a playful swat. Eventually the golden opportunity presented itself when Mr Vanilla and I were both alone in the bedroom getting ready for a night out. Having established that hubby was watching I hurriedly shucked my clothes then pretended to drop my hairbrush. As I slowly bent to retrieve it from the floor his grumbled response came as both a surprise and disappointment, "You're still not dressed! You'd better get a move on, or you'll be making us late as always!" Okay, I thought to myself, this man quite obviously doesn't have a pulse!

Since subtleties were quite obviously lost on this particular male specimen I wistfully resigned myself to the fact that a more direct approach would have to be executed. So, once again I started scheming in the hope of concocting a foolproof plan.

Finally after a lot of thought and then a seemingly endless wait, the opportune moment arrived. Hubby was relaxing on the settee after a large meal, looking thoroughly satisfied, and both kids were out for the evening. 'Perfect,' I thought!

I exchanged my casual clothes for a sexy but classy mini dress and for maximum effect teamed it with a not so classy v-string thong. 'This should definitely do the trick!' I told myself as I returned to the living-room with antsy butterflies aflutter in the pit of my stomach. Excellent, Mr Vanilla was still sitting where I had left him, now with his legs stretched out in an even more relaxed pose. 'Yes, perfect!'

Capitalizing on the ditsy blond side of my personality I bowled over to where Mr Vanilla sat in his meditative state and 'accidentally on purpose' tripped over his outstretched legs, elegantly upending myself across his muscular thighs. As luck would have it the hemline of my silky mini rose significantly to reveal my indecently exposed butt cheeks. 'Yes,' I thought, 'there is no way in hell that he will fail to notice my night-glow-white protuberant bum cheeks shining up at him!'

Oh how wrong could I be! Mr Vanilla looked down at me quizzically and asked with a hint of concern, "Are you alright?" When I responded in the affirmative, his barked reply was, "Well watch where you're going! You could have knocked over my coffee or even injured yourself!" Oh well, at least the dear man cares!

So now, the hard reality dawned... it was time to stop beating around the bush! I had to go for broke and take that darned bull by the horns! The question was, how could I tell Mr Vanilla my newly discovered interest without significant reddening of the wrong cheeks?

After some careful consideration of the many ways to express my desperate need to be spanked, I made my decision. I would ask him if he had any secret fantasies. That way I could naturally give mention to my own. Now, of course, it was simply a matter of finding a night when both kids would be out for the evening!

Eventually, the moment arrived. I cooked my beloved his favourite meal, plied him with alcohol and calmed my nerves with Dutch courage before snuggling up to him on the sofa and popping my question, "So... do you have any sexual fantasies?"

After a long and awkward pause he replied, "Yes... I do... but my fantasy is probably quite different to what most men think about."

"Really?.. What is it?" I prompted, thinking to myself that I might get lucky!

"Well..." he continued, "I've always got turned on by the thought of taking artistic and sexy photographs of a hot and naked twenty year old model."

No longer in the bloom of youth, I felt rather affronted by his announcement and immediately spat my reply, "Not in your wildest..." Then the realization hit me that this could potentially be a perfect opportunity. Modifying my tone I continued, "...Well maybe we could act out your fantasy if you'd be happy to substitute the 20 year old model for your 45 year old wife..."

Right, the seed was planted. Now all I had to do was wait to see if it germinated. Fortunately, Mr Vanilla's ears pricked up keenly so I decided it was the perfect opportunity to explain to him how we could have twice the fun by combining my fantasy with his!

To cut a long story short, I became a very uncooperative 20 year old nude model who gave her impatient photographer no end of trouble. Naturally the model required several spankings to keep her mind focused on the task of posing artistically enough to satisfy her photographer's discerning and critical eye. So you could say it turned out to be a win / win situation and as an added bonus we have some photos to commemorate the occasion!

So, to all you unspanked and frustrated ladies, don't despair about your oblivious Mr Vanillas! Just remember there are many flavours of Vanilla and not all respond well to subtle hints. If yours is anything like mine, innuendo will be completely lost on him. Communication is the most important thing in any relationship and this is especially true when it comes to enhancing your love life and fulfilling your desires, whatever they may be. Remember too the old adage, that if you want something, you should be willing to give something back in return! Thus, my friends, when it comes to your Vanilla male it is simply a matter of finding the right saucy topping to spice him up, so you too can turn your fantasies into reality!  
28 comments:
TheEnglishMaster said...
Bravo! Well done! What a very happy and satisfying outcome. You overcame quite a poser ... by becoming one! (sorry - awful pun)
And thank you! This is such a delightful and wittily written account. I laughed out loud at your earlier attempts and hubby's lead-balloon responses. And I bet plenty of readers here will be screaming, "How COULD he NOT??" at those parts. But your solution was the perfect one - I love the image of the VERY uncooperative model!
I do hope this inspires others to take that step, though your account does raise the question of why 'reddening the wrong cheeks' (LOL) can be such a big fear for us.
2 November 2011 22:18
smeple said...
Entertaining , funny AND informative too - what more could a reader ask? I only hope it works for unspanked men as well. Very nice job, Leena!
3 November 2011 00:01
Janine said...
LOL This was a great article--funny yet helpful for those of us in the same situation. :) Thanks for sharing this!
3 November 2011 01:22
Seegee said...
Delightful and highly amusing article. I hope we see more from Mrs Cross in future issues.
3 November 2011 06:38
PinkAngel said...
A very real account of this issue, showing the frustration and some of the humour too. It is nice to know that you did get through to him eventually :)
3 November 2011 09:22
corncrake said...
You make what is a really frustrating situation amusing and somehow more manageable. Great writing!
4 November 2011 14:38
Miss_Naughty said...
Very entertaining. I went through a similar situation of wanting to spice up a tired relationship but dispensed with any subtleties and hey presto it worked. I loved the lead up in your story which was funny, but really, some you blokes you truly want to 'smack'! Well done.
4 November 2011 21:08
Alef said...
A very funny article on a serious subject — there are so many people out there in the same situation. But I am not quite sure the right person got spanked; even vanilla husbands have to take some responsibility for getting things moving....
5 November 2011 08:03
sugarmouse said...
Brilliant! I do admire your persistance and courage!
S
6 November 2011 16:12
anitalynn said...
Ha Ha! The conveniently bent over bottom never worked for me either. It would lead to other delightfully pleasant things, but never a well placed smack or two or more.
10 November 2011 17:01
travelmark said...
Persistence indeed....and creative! So have you been able to resume your duties as the errant housekeeper as well, perhaps photographing the evidence of the consequences of a less-than thorough job? Just a thought...
25 May 2012 17:46
mati said...
Your article made me laugh throughout, it sounds all so familiar to me. A certain type of hubby seems to be a worldwide phenomenon. ;-)
5 June 2012 21:10
snooz said...
That was so nice. You made me laugh and cheered me up. It's also a great example of "if at first you don't succeed, try plan B" etc. And Oh btw - it brought back some wonderful memories.
1 December 2012 05:43
Carson said...
Unfortunately I've only ever had female vanilla partners and the issue of domestic violence prevents pushing them into the fold :(
8 December 2012 21:36
westviking said...
I agree with Alef. A very funny article on a serious subject.
5 March 2013 14:21
flowerchild said...
This was well written and humorous from beginning to end, but sometimes even absolute bluntness doesn't work. And then there's the problem of exchanging fantasies, when his is as abhorant to you, as yours is to him.
5 March 2013 17:38
sweethot1971 said...
You have given me some ideas. I have a vanilla husband and I have expressed my desire to be spanked but he is always afraid that he will hurt me. Thanks to your article, I am going to approach him and ask what his fantasy is and perhaps combine the two together. Great plan!
6 March 2013 04:33
samslipper said...
If at first you don't suceed - they got there in the end, very amusing article.
9 March 2013 23:24
canadianspankee said...
It took a lot of work but things did good in the end. Now of course for you to be fair all around, you have to write an article about how to get one's vanilla wife to spank her husband...LOL.. Well presented and rather funny.
13 March 2013 04:02
mrswitcheroo said...
Very clever and quite funny. The visual of you bending over with no response is a hoot!! But it is a serious and sensitive problem. When you are on the side of not getting your desires met it is quite frustrating with no perfect solution in sight.
27 April 2013 01:28
smithgirl said...
You gave me some ideas. And for me the bent over posed worked right away. Of course I was bending over to find more suitable underwear than the pink thong I had on
22 February 2014 12:39
bripuk said...
Well done! It's good to read of some success in persuading your other half of your desires. I am married to a vanilla wife who I love dearly who used to spank me... but it was clear that it was done out of a sense of duty rather than her obtaining any enjoyment fom the activity. I've now given up which has more or less curtailed any sexual activity between us but life goes on.
15 March 2014 15:13
mheero said...
Well done.
28 February 2019 13:38
MistressK said...
A great introduction to the Library - thankyou :)

One of my best friends was having trouble with her hair and in sorting it out I found she enjoyed having her hair pulled. She was a really bossy boots to her husband and teenage family yet seemed to melt to me

. Over a short time period of time I found she had an unfulfilled need to be submissive and our exploration of pain and pleasure developed.

"Do you enjoy this with your husband too?" was a question I asked her. The "no" response was later explained. " He just doesn't like to cause be pain"

Her groans of pleasure were the reason for forsaking my male partner who role played a submissive role with me but did not believe it.

We made a dinner party date and "G" my friend is a superb cook. Nothing was really planned but she happened to wear a short black mini-skirt and white blouse- perhaps slightly schoolgirl.

At the end of the meal I started to tease "You know you have been a naughty girl" and it was easy to make up an answer to her "Why"

Can you imagine why "G" for this special meal chose to wear large, white cotton knickers instead of erotic lingerie? That underwear was of course exposed when the naughty girl was placed over my knee for our first, rather playful, spanking session in front of our husbands as a kind of dessert.

We seemed to be more inspired than our fellas who seemed more interested in talking about the cricket club problems and they just said "OK" when we said "We'll be back soon " as we left quietly.

A little later the men did indeed look up from a card game.

I returned with G completely naked and showed off her now red glowing butt cheeks.

So to my sisters with vanilla males you might find your dreams fulfilled a female neighbour :)
2 May 2019 12:31
Petespankboy said...
It seems that a lot of ladies here want their husbands/partners to spank them, but perhaps more difficult for men to get their naturally vanilla wives to spank them ? Mine does spank me but far too lightly to have much impression despite me kind of pleading with her to spank harder !
20 July 2019 08:15
Caddiejo said...
Mine is a work in progress. I praise and praise him, make sure he gets a ‘reward’ (wink wink!) every time he makes the effort and reciprocate by prancing around in the saucy outfits he enjoys. I just dream of the day we build up to where he is confident enough to give me a real punishment spanking.
23 August 2019 13:28
cherryripe said...
Well I am sad to say my very Vanilla ex hubster just did not get the 'spanky' thing at all! Not the reason my marriage ended though however I have been 7 years with my partner who is very 'spank orientated' so all's well that ends well. Some you win some you loose :-)

I did find your writings so very funny though as I also tried many of your tricks looking back I have to laugh though at the time it was most perplexing.
25 August 2019 23:31
Often123 said...
It has to be frustrating enough for our female readers, and even more for males wanting their female partners to spank them. Fortunately I was lucky.
29 August 2019 20:10

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