The Library of Spanking Fiction: Wellred Weekly

Wellred Weekly
Volume 1, Number 11 : October 21, 2012
Items of interest regarding all things spanking

Christianity and Adult Spanking
by Katie B

What does it mean to be a Christian?
Christianity means growing in faith on a spiritual journey towards your salvation and acknowledging Jesus Christ as your Savior. To me being a Christian means you have a relationship with Christ. You've had an experience brought about by the presence of the Lord that has changed your heart. You no longer want to live the way you were but seek God's will and desires for your life. Basically you want to please God by worshipping him and bringing glory to him. So does being a spanko bring God glory? Hardly! But can one still dabble in this lifestyle and still be a Christian?

What does it mean to be a spanko?
I really had no good definition myself of what a spanko was, I just knew I was one, so I used the words from an article called It's a Spanko Thing... You Wouldn’t Understand, found at Bethany's Woodshed. Spankophiles, or spankos as they are known to each other, are adult males and females who are interested in and/or practice spanking among themselves -- either administering or receiving, or both. All serious spankos will hasten to add that to the definition that they condone the practice for consenting adults only. Most either take no position on the question of spanking children, or they actively disapprove and refuse to practice it themselves. Many spankos dislike applying the judgmental term 'perversion' to spanking and shun the clinical-sounding 'fetish'. Rather, they refer to their interest as just that -- an 'interest' or perhaps a 'kink' or 'diversion' or even 'play'.

Christianity and being a spanko... do they mix?
I must admit it's been a real struggle for me over the years. There have been many times I've felt unworthy to be called a Christian because of my writing and sexual desires. However I always counter-balanced those feelings with figuring God made me this way so surely he understands and approves to a degree of what I am doing. And I've talked with other members on the site about this feeling from time to time and must admit my fears have calmed somewhat. But there is still that slight guilt lingering down in my gut.

I've been writing spanking stories since I was eight or nine. I have no idea where the interest came from but it seems to have always been a part of me. I never dreamed of sharing my stories with anyone... EVER! But as an adult, I'd get online and read stories others had written or... oh my gosh... purchase them from book-stores... online of course! But never did I think about having others read what I'd written. I felt they weren't good enough... not flowery like many writers. I didn't feel that I had the gift of making pictures in the reader's mind with my words. However, at the same time I liked my stories and most importantly I enjoyed writing them. But the guilt of writing them was always tearing at me. I got away from the guilt somewhat by reminding myself no one else was ever going to be seeing them so what difference did it make.

Then in January 2010 I discovered the Kilahara Library and fell in love with the site. I liked the concept of what Flopsy and Februs were doing and truly wanted to be a part of it. After much thought, I decided to give it a whirl.

Am I still in agony writing these stories? Yes. However I continue to diligently practice my faith and have recently found a wonderful Christian partner who is not really into the spanking scene but has actually encouraged me to continue writing. It was very difficult telling him about my fetish but once I did, I was glad, he has been nothing but supportive... after the initial shock of course!

What is a Christian Domestic Marriage?
Well according to an article found at Shakesville, a Christian Domestic Marriage is one set up according to Biblical standards. The husband is the authority figure in the household. The wife is submissive to her husband as the Lord demands and the husband loves his wife as himself. The husband has total authority but must answer to God for his actions and decisions. Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) is much more then just spanking. It is the husband loving the wife enough to guide and teach her.

Although there are many verses that back up this belief, here are two that most Christians are very familiar with:

Ephesians 5:22-33...
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word...

Ephesians 5:28...
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

The website, Christian Domestic Discipline, is a popular site for couples that follow this lifestyle. It is run by a small group of women who are involved with traditional 'domestic discipline' relationships. According to these women, domestic discipline is not spanking. A domestic discipline relationship begins when the couple decides one partner will maintain a leadership role, usually meaning the husband. They also believe that DD means that the 'head' will utilize disciplinary actions when necessary. What form that discipline would take is totally determined by each couple. Although most couples who use domestic discipline will include spanking, some do not.

This group also declares that the Bible neither requires nor forbids corporal punishment of wives. Many Bible passages, as already stated, refer to wifely submission, and in a historical view it is was very logical to assume that this submission could include corporal punishment.

An interesting dilemma was posed on the site, The Intimate couple, by a woman who was married to a man who enjoyed being spanked. He didn't share that fetish with his wife for 19 years but when he finally did and managed to convince his wife to try it, she actually loved it! Unfortunately she felt it was morally wrong and told her husband she wouldn't do it any more which was a big disappointment to him. I do, however, commend the woman for trying to find a satisfying solution as she began seeking answers from other Christians.

The response she received was extremely well thought out and believe it or not eased my own mind a bit. Although there is much more to the article than the following, I thought this was the essence of what was being said:

God designed sex for us to have fun and enjoy each other. In our sexual relationship with our spouse, we learn to please each other first and then, of course, receive pleasure ourselves. This whole process must involve honoring each other, and preferring each other. You cannot be involved in anything that degrades you, physically or psychologically hurts you, or that is clearly contrary to Scripture.

You have to determine if your husband's desire for spanking is something playful and enjoyable for him - and if it might also be enjoyable for you. If yes, then spank away! Your conscience need not be sensitive about it. If this activity is only designed to bring pain, humiliate, and make your husband feel demeaned then it is not healthy and needs to be dropped altogether.

What are my personal views on this type of marriage? For those of you that have read any of my stories this will most likely blow your minds but I very much believe that the wife needs to submit to the husband. God has placed him as the head of the household to lead... not abuse... the family unit. This does not mean he makes decisions without consulting his partner. I feel the couple needs to be participate equally in decision making.

I'm also not so sure I'd let him spank my ass for something he thought I'd done wrong unless we were having foreplay. Shocking I know! I can remember my mom telling me once that she let my dad have the final say about things and at the time I vowed never to do that when I got married. I thought that was weak and certainly not right for today's woman. But over the years, as I matured into the Christian woman I am today, I have come to see the love my mom had for my father and for the written word. She lived her whole married life honoring what God commanded and quietly passed it on to me.

Summing it all up!
So, all in all, I do believe there can be a 'happy mixing' between Christianity and being a spanko. As long as things are kept in perspective, one can have a long and happy life in both worlds. Obviously this is the belief of many authors on this site as well. And with their permission, I am including several of their quotes about this subject below:

Crimson Kid:
Well, I'm a practising Christian and I've personally never felt that there was any contradiction between my religious beliefs and my occasional spankophile practices. Early in our marriage my vanilla wife did seem to find it difficult to reconcile her religious beliefs with playfully or erotically smacking my seat for me, but as she's become more liberal theologically she's also become more tolerant of my spanking-related desires.

From what I've seen of it, so-called 'Christian domestic discipline' (which appears to be exclusively M/F in orientation) is based on the biblically-based claim that the husband is always the head of the household and may employ loving, moderate corporal punishment, the figurative 'rod of correction,' to control his less-mature wife's behavior when necessary. (A few spanked wives have admitted that being thus 'corrected' seems to have improved their sex lives as well, but that's generally attributed to their feeling 'cleansed' of all resentment and disobedience toward their supposedly more mature, paternalistically wise husbands.)

In my experience, right-wing fundamentalist Christians tend to approve of wife-spanking in much the same way that they do of child-spanking: "It's a good idea as long as nobody enjoys it," i.e. it has to be pure punishment not tainted by eroticism.

The more liberal Christian denominations generally are more accepting of kinky sexuality among consenting adults, particularly if they're married partners, presumably based on the concept that God doesn't find human eroticism to be sinful of and by itself.

It is my understanding that even the most conservative Christian churches think that consensual foreplay between married couples, including mild S&M, is permitted.

I don't think the church has any kind of stance on the issue - certainly my last pastor knew of my kink and it didn't bother him, as many people in church were struggling with far more serious life and relationship issues and we are a happily married couple involved in church activities.

I suspect traditional Anglicans in the UK would simply see spanking between couples as kinky - and would disapprove of that kind of foreplay. In a more DD context, it would be seen as abuse, and the participants urged to seek counselling! Quite different for children, for whom the 'spare the rod' principle still holds sway among many, even if they're more discreet about saying these days than they once were. For myself, anything done with love works for me!

Spanking was very much a part of the religious culture I grew up in. It was taught from the pulpit. I distinctly remember our preacher describing his own youthful punishments in sermons. He would conclude by tearfully saying that his mother "loved him enough to punish him" (with her nodding in the audience) and then he would tie that mother's love to God's love, thus reinforcing the message.

To the lay community, as addressed from the pulpit, self-flagellation was never encouraged, neither was spousal discipline - for Catholics that is. I remember Pentecostals promoting child CP but, offhand, I can remember nothing in any of the gospels where Christ spoke of CP. He was a tolerant liberal!

To me, spankos and Christians can be a great mix. Just because there are people who enjoy the scene and participate in spanking, doesn't mean they turn their back on any type of religion. I never did. The spankos I know are good, honest people. They take pride in their home, work, religion, and themselves. It's called 'meeting of the minds'.

Galatians 6:1...
Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.

Read into this what you will!

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